FIRST ENCOUNTERS

I was about five years old. My mother had taken us to the park, me and my little sister and brother, who would have been about three and one. We were playing in the sandbox when two little black kids, a boy and girl, came to play. They looked about three and four. They began throwing sand, throwing a fistful and laughing. They began throwing it in the direction of my brother and sister, towards their eyes. In my family I was expected to protect the younger kids, so I told the black kids to stop. They just laughed and continued to throw sand, probably too little to realize they could actually hurt someone that way. I told them again to stop, and that I would throw sand in their eyes if they didn't. When they did it again, I picked up a handful of sand and threw it in their eyes. They both started crying and I felt very bad. I hadn't wanted to do it, but I felt I had to protect my brother and sister.

Afterwards my mother asked me why I had thrown the sand in their eyes. I told her why, and she told me that their mother might think I had thrown sand in their eyes because they were Negroes. I was stunned. Why would she think that. I knew nothing then about slavery or racial predjudice, and my mother didn't explain it, so I thought that was the most preposterous thing I had ever heard. Now, of course, I know better. (white woman born in 1951)

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